May 2013
auspisstice:
cyberdepressed:
HAVE U EVER NOTICED THAT VAGINAS AND SCHOOL BOTH HAVE 6 LETTERS AND ARE EMPTY HOLES OF NOTHING THAT CAN HOLD SCREAMING CHILDREN FOR 9 MONTHS
i
binkshapiro:
whosromeo:
girls are attracted to assholes because in elementary school girls were told “if he’s mean to you that means he likes you”
the da vinci code has been cracked
jinn0uchi:
dendropsyche:
OKAY so i just saw the most ridiculous thing at the store today
so we come across this thing
and we discover you can turn it inside out and
ITS HELLO KITTY I’M
HSE’S EVEN GOT HER OWN LITTLE CHICKEN DRUMSTICK IM SO DONE
why the fuck
ejacutastic:
when guys talk about how gross periods are i just laugh because guys have a floppy piece of flesh that gets hard and that’s pretty fuckin weird, bucko
theblindvisionary:
we take the naps we think we deserve
unicornmunch:
here’s a list of what i’d like to do with you:
hug
go on walks while holding hands
smile
kiss
cuddle
have cute little dates
have movie nights
take adorable pictures
go new places
try new things
fall in love
brutally fuck you
look at the stars
do everything i was ever scared to do alone.
flutterlings:
the whole yahoo/tumblr thing is rly just like when a single dad marries a new woman and the kids get rebellious and are like “YOU’RE NOT MY REAL MOM”
sfux:
i feel like people who eat breakfast really have their lives together
boys are so cute and they dont know they’re so cute so they smile and smirk and cock their heads to the side and smile at you and they bite their lips and when they stretch, you can see their stomach, and that little line of hair going to their belly button and down to their crotch and some of them run their fingers through their hair and make it all messy on purpose and sometimes their hands...
If I'm comfortable with you, I'll:
call you names
tell you weird and personal details about myself
say “I NEED TO PEE” instead of just brb
type in caps a lot.
If i’m extra comfortable with you I’ll do all that and:
talk casually about porn and really perverted thoughts
share funny photos from my tumblr dash
actually tell you when i’m upset
try to make conversation with you
just generally act really silly when I’m in a...
shannananan:
mercimonamie:
i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.
oh my god you managed to one up john green.
largebeard:
foodchewer:
*hides good snacks from family members*
rneerkat:
“youre always on your computer” well ur always on my nerves
sloth-grunge:
do you think if i die now i’ll have enough time to be reincarnated as kim kardashians baby
do u ever just make scenarios in your head that will never happen but makes you so happy so you just keep on imagining them
sherwat:
chrissykilljoybitchtits:
inc-omparable:
im-fandoomed:
hitlervevo:
why the fuck cant we text the police
lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you can’t call the police because the murderer might hear you
Here in Canada you can
Here in England we just… scream and run
Here in Scotland we paint our...
littlemixbutts:
bodenniss:
littlemixbutts:
i wish i was a mermaid so i could have a nice shiny tail and a pretty seashell bra and a beautiful voice that i could use to entice cute boys and make them crash their ships and drown at sea so human women could rise as the dominate gender of the land
well that escalated quickly
paige i’m a lesbian why would i entice cute boys where did you...
wild-lion:
never introduce your friends to one another because they end up liking each other more than they ever liked you
agrund:
am i really that ugly
“I am a hard person to love but when I love, I love really hard.”
– Tupac Shakur (via ruthless-villain)
im slowly unlearning how to english
